Loneliness is on the rise, so we reveal how to find your community, plus what you need to know about starting your own.

Whether you’ve got a vast friendship group or not, it’s unlikely that you’re all going to have the same interests. You might not even live in the same area. Or you might have just moved and know no-one at all. Which is where clubs and groups in your community could be just what you need to reconnect with other people and your passions. Because despite us being more connected than ever thanks to social networking, reports of loneliness continue to rise, with experts claiming we’re experiencing a ‘loneliness epidemic’ and stats showing that around 10% of adults around the world feel lonely.  

“Our life longevity is linked to the depth and meaningfulness of the relationships that we have around us and that support both our physical and psychological health,” explains Dr Charlotte Armitage, psychologist and author of Generation Zombie.

“Unfortunately, the ease of connection via online platforms is turning us into a society of lazy communicators. We may feel we are connected to others but in reality, those relationships are superficial and parasocial, resulting in us feeling lonelier and more disconnected.” 

It also means that there’s a real risk we could lose the art of conversation, because with fewer opportunities to practice our interpersonal skills, it feels harder and more overwhelming when there are chances to connect in real life. This is why joining a club could be all it takes to save the day – “it gives you something to bond over such as a mutual interest which makes it less daunting,” continues Dr Charlotte. 

THE NEW BREED OF SOCIAL START-UPS 

Often started by friends who realise they’re ‘onto something’, Crystal and Natalie, best friends since university began Articles Club after years of emailing each other links to articles they found interesting. Extending it out to eight friends and a living room meet up, the club has now been around for almost nine years, they recently hosted an event at the new Soho House in Sau Paulo Brazil and they’re currently looking to scale the club globally via an ‘official host programme’. 

“When we launched it felt refreshing to have something different to a book club where you didn’t have to commit to reading a whole book to join in. At our in-person events we announce the event and topic then share the article the day before so people can read it in time but don’t feel the need to over prepare,” explains co-founder Crystal Cansdale.

“We then guide a conversation around the article, asking questions and allowing for everyone to talk. We keep the conversation to around 15 people and the topics vary all the time, from why astrology is rising and religion is dying, to the logic of luck.” 

How quickly these clubs expand is a sign of how needed they are amongst communities. Becca Broadbent started her run club, These Mums Do eight years ago with 18 people who wanted to complete couch to 5k and she now has over 100 active members with a variety of challenges on offer.

“It’s grown from that initial group to a 5k improver class, a 5-10k club and then a half marathon club. Everyone is at a different level but because of that most find new run buddies at their pace and that’s how the friendships start and develop,” says Becca.

“It’s become a safe space and I know it’s been a lifeline for some – no-one judges if you’re ranting about life/kids/partners and everyone is there to support you. Our motto is ‘when women support women, incredible things happen’ and it’s true. I wouldn’t have done half the crazy stuff I’ve done without run club – from Tough Mudder to Endure 4 to the Benidorm Half.” 

FIND YOUR TRIBE 

Despite social media zapping us of real-life interaction, if you’re thinking of starting your own club, it can be a great place to ‘float’ your idea to gauge if anyone in your already existing network might be keen. After Alexander Mytton returned from a solo trip to India where he found himself on daily 6-7 hour walks that were incredibly therapeutic, he decided to see if anyone might like to join him on a hike back in the UK.

“I put up an Instagram story essentially saying – ‘I’m going to be going for some walks in the woods, does anybody want to come?’ and it was actually one of the most replied to things I’ve ever posted, thousands of people saying they wanted to but no-one else in their friendship group did. It was really comforting to know others out there wanted to do the same,” he says.  

Two years later and he’s run hikes all over the UK and attracted a wide demographic of different ages and backgrounds but with a common love of nature and being outdoors.

“We’re craving this connection and a sense of tribe or belonging that’s become so elusive now and these types of in-person meetups satiate this need. I love the people the hikes attract, and the energy attached to the experience – it just provides a lovely backdrop for people to connect and some of the attendees now meet up independently of the hikes,” says Alex. 

Charlotte Black also used Instagram to test the waters when she set up ‘Women in Wellness Supper Clubs’ after moving back to the UK from Sydney where she’d lived for two years.

“I knew I wanted to build new connections in the wellness industry in London and so I searched for networking events and meet-ups but everything I found was a little too corporate. I wanted something exciting, creative and inclusive so I posted on Instagram to see if any women in wellness wanted to join me for dinner. Eight amazing women booked in, and it turned into such a beautiful evening, I knew I had to keep running them.” 

ADVICE FOR CLUB FOUNDERS 

There are plenty of community clubs out there with more and more popping up, so if you are thinking about starting your own club, try and home in on something that hasn’t been done yet.

“Finding a niche or a gap in the market is your best way to start, as well as adding your unique spin on it,” advises Charlotte.

“Work on building an established online community to give you a better chance of maintaining a group of regular attendees but also, don’t feel disheartened at the start. Some months are much better for events that others.’ 

Alex agrees. “If you take ego out of the equation then it doesn’t matter if no-one turns up and I’ve learnt that the less you clutch to an outcome, the more easily it flows. If you genuinely love what it is you’re creating and sharing, it will eventually shine and that energy will attract in time and your people will arrive,” he says.

“What I would say though is stay as consistent as you can with your meet-ups – humans like consistency and it means people will know what to look for each month or week which means they’re more likely to commit to attending.” 

ADVICE FOR CLUB ATTENDEES 

The beauty of joining a club that you have a special interest in means that there is a huge incentive for you to attend, especially when you start to make friends and connections there. However, because most clubs are informal, the founders don’t expect you to be there each and every time.

“I have ladies who join monthly, bi-monthly and ones that come back twice a year – seeing familiar faces come back is one of the highlights for me,” continues Charlotte. 

For Sarah Burton, an attendee of These Mums Do, she started off with the couch to 5k group but now attends the half marathon training as much as she can.

“I try to go every week and I notice it when I don’t. I’ve made some incredible friends through the club and they’ve become my biggest cheerleaders. It’s given me a sense of community, friendships, more positive mental health, I feel stronger and healthier and also feel a sense of accomplishment. I’d tell anyone considering joining a club to stop putting it off and just get started.” 

At Articles Club, one of Crystal’s favourite stories is about two people who went from strangers to best friends and who ended up attending each other’s weddings. Another attendee ended up making work connections via the club, which is often what happens at Charlotte’s Women in Wellness Supper Clubs.

“As well as friendships, there’s also been a host of wonderful collaborations, and one attendee recently hired someone she met at my Supper club to work for her business which felt like such a full-circle moment. Seeing these connections blossom is exactly why I started this community,” says Charlotte.

“As someone who had a hard time at school, creating a kind, inclusive and supportive space for women is very important to me.” 

Creating an organic opportunity for people to meet and connect without the pressure of drinking or parties, whether it’s a physical goal or a shared passion, these clubs are becoming the new way to forge meaningful bonds and long-lasting friendships.

“Society needs to offer more opportunities for people to come together naturally without the barriers that often make connection feel so difficult,” says Crystal.

“Event-based communities are finally filling that gap, offering a chance to connect in a healthier way and giving people a space to break the ice with others who share similar interests.”